


Watching Over the Years

by flowerpotgirl



Category: The West Wing
Genre: F/M, Post Bartlett Administration
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-02-23
Updated: 2008-02-23
Packaged: 2019-05-15 01:32:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,722
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14781101
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flowerpotgirl/pseuds/flowerpotgirl
Summary: A member of staff reminisces about Josh and Donna's relationship.





	Watching Over the Years

**Author's Note:**

> A copy of this work was once archived at National Library, a part of the [ West Wing Fanfiction Central](https://fanlore.org/wiki/West_Wing_Fanfiction_Central), a West Wing fanfiction archive. More information about the Open Doors approved archive move can be found in the [announcement post](http://archiveofourown.org/admin_posts/8325).

  
Author's notes: Not mine and never going to be. I found myself thinking how others might view our favourite couple.  


* * *

When I say I watched them it makes me sound like a stalker, but that is not what I mean.   
I just spent a lot of the time on the periphery and they were undoubtedly at the centre of the action so inevitably my eyes, like a lot of peoples’, were drawn towards them. The same is true, in a way, of anyone who has power or authority in the workplace and they were always important and now are the kingpins of a very special workplace. Lots of eyes, apart from the staff, focussed on the White House and Senior Staff drew attention by their job titles alone.   
But these two also each had a certain charisma of their own as well as the novelty value of their current matching jobs. They were a rare success story in the relationship shipwreck that is politics. They were not demonstrative in public and less astute observers found them puzzling. But after a while their staff began to understand the complex unit that is Josh-and-Donna and all of a sudden the subtle things took on greater significance. At times it could be awkward just being in the same room as them when a look spoke volumes. They had their own code and it could be difficult to keep up with their conversation. Like listening to a foreign language when you only know a few words. Even being strictly professional and hard at work, they could make others feel excluded, just by the way they were in tune with each other. Some people were confused by the banter they had going but to my mind it was the only way they could flirt without giving anyone cause to complain. Rumours abounded, but there was never any evidence of anything untoward.  
I have never before seen someone make love with their eyes and always thought it was some girly myth until the day I got caught in a lockdown with Josh and Donna. To the untrained eye it was business as usual and they were very professional, but I caught a glimpse of some of the looks they exchanged and it was not the air-conditioning being off that made me sweat. Luckily, it was a short incarceration.  
To be honest, I first noticed Donna during the second Bartlett term. I became aware of her walking the corridors of the White House and treasured every smile she threw my way. Yes, I am yet another silent Donna devotee. There has been much talk of Josh’s fan club, but only because they make themselves known with silly websites and stunts at public events. Donna’s silent admirers are more numerous, but we keep quiet, partly because that is the kind of people we are, partly because she would be uncomfortable around us if she knew and only a small part because Josh would probably get the lot of us sent somewhere nasty if he even suspected. Even now he retains a jealous watch on any man who gets too close. In a way I can’t blame him. When you win the gold prize you make sure you look after it.  
I saw a lot of Donna for a while there and most of that was with Josh. People would speculate on their relationship but I just watched and made up my own mind. The clues were there but carefully overlaid with a web of misdirection.   
I saw Donna getting frustrated with her role and wanting more challenges, but I could also see Josh struggling with the increasing array of problems facing the administration. I must confess to a certain (non-sexual) fascination with Josh. Initially I saw him only in relation to Donna but, as time went on and I had the opportunity to observe him, I realised what a complex person he was and began to appreciate a little of his character. He is the most committed person I have ever known and, at that time, practically lived in the West Wing.  
When Donna was in Gaza he looked lost, like he always did when she was absent, and I will never forget his face and the look of agony on it after he heard about the explosion. He looked like his world had fallen apart and he only kept going fuelled by a determination to ‘do something’. I feel he would have just stopped breathing if Donna had not got out of that SUV alive.   
I had to hide my worry but I was glad that he went out to Germany - he was what Donna needed then. Maybe she would have pulled through anyway, but Josh being there gave her incentive to get well.  
It was painful to watch her come back to work, struggling with a wheelchair. I wanted to take her somewhere safe and keep her there. Only Donna was not like that and she battled to get fit. Inside she was nowhere near healed but she forged on putting others first. Some days she came in looking pale and drawn and I wondered if she had been having nightmares, but she never told anyone. She seemed harder, almost with a protective shell around herself and I think that is how she was able to leave.  
I have only heard about her leaving speech in the middle of the bullpen, but I have heard it from a lot of people. If only she knew how many people were devastated by her leaving. We had no hope but seeing her brightened up each day.  
It was no surprise that Josh left so quickly. He had had so much more of her so the loss could only be much greater. Like a sudden eclipse of the sun.  
I heard about the two campaigns and saw them both on the television but that only underlined my sense of loss. Once Santos became the nominee it seemed inevitable that Donna would join that campaign but it took longer than anyone expected. Rumour has it that Josh refused her a job, but that I cannot believe. The man would have walked across hot coals if she smiled at him and Josh hated not to know here she was or who she was seeing.  
Anyway, she joined the campaign and once I caught a glimpse of her in a corridor in the West Wing. Sad as I am, that fleeting view made my day.  
As you know, Leo McGarry died and Matt Santos was elected on the same day. I knew Donna would be with Josh through both events and I envied him a little - not the sadness but having Donna there when he needed her.  
I saw more of them then - in the OEOB and the corridors of the West Wing. Josh was wound up like a child before a birthday party and I wondered how he could keep going at that level of intensity. It reminded me of all those warnings about not looking into the sun or it will blind you. Get too near to Josh Lyman then and you got caught up in the pressure cooker of his existence. A few of the President-elect’s staff were more experienced but the rest were young and went round looking terrified. I noticed Donna had gained a lot of new supporters and did overhear some comments about how she was the only one able to get Josh’s attention sometimes. They said it like it was news but the old hands in the building just smiled to themselves. There was also speculation about Josh and Donna’s relationship which was also nothing new. I did wonder what post she would have in the new Administration, but no announcement seemed forthcoming.   
It took very little time for word of Josh losing it with a member of staff to cross the road and even less for his holiday plans to become public knowledge. CJ Cregg shouting down the phone ‘Are you telling me that you are actually consenting to go on holiday with Idiot Boy after all that?’ did help to give the game away. Margaret never shut the door unless she was told to do so and CJ’s conversation was not quiet. The heightened security at the time meant that Josh had to inform the Secret Service if he left the country and that is how I heard of it. It was, in many ways, a shock, but yet no surprise. They were as the books put it ‘meant for each other’ and it was only a matter of time before they realised what the rest of us had been aware of for years.  
As it happens, I was asked to continue in my role and so I have been able to continue observing Donna and, inevitably, Josh as they have developed their COS roles and as they have grown closer as a couple. I have been closer to them this time around, which has caused me pain and pleasure in equal amounts.  
Although it pains me to see Donna with another man, I have been so proud of the way she has grown professionally and I do not begrudge her the happiness which is so apparent these days. If it cannot be me then Josh seems to be right for her and she is definitely the best thing that has ever happened to him.  
I was there when they married and I will be there next month when their first baby is born, but I have decided that enough is enough. I need a clean break and to try and find a woman who in some small way measures up to Donna, difficult though that will be. I had thought I had gained some perspective when she left the White House, but her return sent me inside out all over again. In many ways it was worse to see the new confident, assured Donna and to be a daily witness to her happiness with Josh. And it was the ultimate irony when I was asked to serve in the Santos White House. It was a good career move, but emotionally challenging for me, to be asked to head up security for the incoming COS and be in daily contact with both Josh and Donna.


End file.
